Saturday, September 26, 2009


It has been a good day - a lot of friends of Jacob filtered through. Jim and Sue (who were with Debbie each night at the hospital) came up and spent the day helping, helping, helping - with things we did not even know anyone could or would help us with. Debbie now has a Jim list for when he comes. Auntie Julie BBQ'd for us and Jake's friends and now we are all crashing. All in all an almost typical day - in the midst of medication etc etc. Though the week ahead has a lot of appointments and such - it feels like - at least to me - that we have a better handle on things. Of course I say that and it is Saturday - we will see what things are like on Thursday.

I thought I would share something that I wrote on June 6th in my journal.


YHWH is true name for God. "I am that I am." God is love. YHWH love is the true essence or character of God. It is not love that is conditional but love that just is - exists.

Henri Nouwen said, "when the imitation of Christ does not mean to live a life like Christ, but to live your life as authentically as Christ lived His, then there are many forms in which a man can be a Christian." (The Wounded Healer, pg 99)

Can I move my life beyond simply living my life like Christ to a deeper authenticity of Christ?
Can I ever really act in authentic surrender of my own self to that of Christ? I think that at times I want so badly to be known as having a character of Christ that it becomes an ego centered striving rather than a fully humble surrender to the spirit of God. Are we able to "let the healing power of the risen Jesus flow through us to reach and touch 0thers, so that we may dream and fight and bear and run where the brave not go?" (Brennan Manning, The Furious Love of God, pg 104).

Am I striving for what Christ died for? Are we striving to create a Christ-like community that has at it's greatest, all-encompassing focus the intense, consuming YHWH love? YHWH love is spirit. Spirit is the presence of God. The presence of God is a consuming fire. When I act in YHWH love there is a patient-kindness-gentleness-humble reflection of the character of God. But rid the picture of YHWH love being sappy, prissy, gooey love. This is not the love that protects, is trustworthy, hopeful, persevering. YHWH love is the glorious radiance of a holy, holy, holy Father.

Paul screams to us and the Corinthians that YHWH love is majestically consuming but that we put a veil over it. Moses put a veil over his face, at first to protect the people from the brilliance of God's glory reflecting in his face. But then, as the glory faded, he kept the veil up keeping up the appearance of YHWH love. YHWH love is not hidden; it is authentic surrender of who we are to the majesty of God.
  • "For we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit." (2Cor 3:18)
  • "Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." (1Cor 13:12-13)
  • The love of Christ (YHWH love) drives us to live as authentically as Christ lived. For the only thing that counts is faith expressing itself in YHWH love. (Gal 5:6)
As I read this again today, I wanted to share it because we have been the recipients of YHWH love. Unselfish, no-strings attached, acts of kindness in the midst of Jacob's Journey. It is our prayer that this would continue as we see those around us that are available to receive this same love.

Today Connor brought us about $2000 from the proceeds of the last benefit concert. What an unbelievable blessing. I met a friend at Bay Federal on Thursday and one of his co-workers gave me the sign that she used for her garage sale to benefit Jacob. On Friday the owner of Betty's Burger's emailed us and told us that they are all praying for us and want to bless us with a meal. (You have got to try the sweet potato fries). We are in the midst of working out a time for Jacob to meet Greg Hansen and his team who rescued Jacob - saved his life.

We have experienced over and over again YHWH love - I am that I am - nothing else can be said.

Tom (Dad)


Anonymous said...

What an awsome book and testimony to God's glory and love you could write using excerpts from your blog. You have the gift from God to do this. How others who go through trials could benefit! Reminds me of Jim Andrew's book "Polishing God's Monuments", a good read. Blessings to you and your family as you continue down the road of Jacob's Journey. My prayers are with you.
One of your many sisters in Christ!

Sharon Shenk said...

Amen! I have commented a few times that Tom and Robbie have written and are writing a book through this journal - a book that would be a source of comfort and strength to others everywhere.
Spread that YHWH love in every way possible!

Anonymous said...

Awesome! I am going to eat at Betty Burgers just to thank them for their prayer support of Jake! As if I needed an excuse to eat there...

Once again just a note to tell you and the whole family that you are in our prayers and that we desire to help in any way you need.

-Rene, Laurie, and Schlaepfer family

Anonymous said...

I must say I whole heartedly agree with the two previous posting. Tom & Robbie have an amazing gift - to share their deepest fears and greatest joys - and do so with such divine grace! A blessing to read - a blessing that has and continues to touch my heart and open it to God's love & glory. A book about what this journey is not such a wild idea.