Sunday, July 26, 2009

Mom reflects

Debbie left this for me on my laptop this morning. She is already at the hospital. She just sent me a text: "Jake had a restless night but is quiet now. They are trying to wean him off the Propopol (sedative) to get him more able to wake up - another step forward." I keep reminding myself that this is the necessary pain.
here is the note that Deb wanted me to share with you:

Last Sunday in July 2009. One month since Jacob was wounded - he's "almost died" @ least a few times since then - "should have died" from the initial hit(s) by downed power lines.

Words cannot express the heartbreaking pain we have/are going through as his mom, family, friends, even strangers via internet and word of mouth. There also have been so many miracles - God showing himself - through the housekeeping woman at Valley Med Burn Unit who quietly cleans Jacob's room and quietly watched words of compassion caring hurt - amazing "angels in disguise" if not sent to comfort Jake then to help me get through all this and try to be available to my son no matter what. I am awed and amazed a the talent, passion and caring of the Dr's, nurses, therapists that have all touched our lives as they care for Jake and us. Obviously I never really knew this Burn Unit world even existed but I know none of us would be "alive" right now if it weren't for them. God is good to provide what he knows we need.

I wish with everything I have that Jake could have "just" broken his leg at rollerskating that night or "just" burned his hand in the fire pit at the beach. It's a horrifying nightmare. I pray daily he will not remember that night nor this past month - at least not remember the pain and suffering. I totally and completely long for hm to know the love and caring and outpouring of help he's been getting from so many: his friends who called 911 and their parents who jumped in their cars, the youth group at the beach that night, the incredibly courageous firefighter/medic who risked his own life to get to Jake's hurt body, ambulance drivers, ER's, nurses who spoke to him and listened to him as they had him in the "tub room" cleaning his initial wounds, surgeons, respiratory therapists, doctors, specialists, Papa and Lala, Aunt Kirky, Auntie Julie, Jim and Sue, Child's family, Lisa, Robbie, Jensen and those who have given Jensen a home over the past many others who have formed a loving community (worldwide) around Jake and us as we persevere with God's help...

I started this writing, intending only to share 2Corinthians 12:9. I hope it is not totally out of context, I'm not the Bible scholar, but I know it is about Paul being given a thorn int he flesh of some kind. He pleaded with the Lord three times that it should leave him and God's response was (and still is today): "my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore (Paul says) I will boast all the more gladly of my weakness, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ then I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. for when I am weak, then I am strong."

I know people are praying for Jake and for us - and for me specifically or I'd not be "surviving". Thank you and please don't stop. Pray God's glory shines in and through Jake somehow.

Debbie (Mom)


Johanna said...

Oh Debbie, we won't stop praying...I love you, JD

Anonymous said...

Dearest Debbie,
Thank you for sharing this morning. Your blog has become the bookends of my day. I will continue to pray day and night for healing for Jacob and strength for you and Tom.

Love and Big hugs,


Cindy Todd said...

Thank you Debbie. I have been praying for you specifically and will continue to do so. I love you, Cindy

Stephanie said...

Love you and praying for you Debbie! God will sustain you...

Anonymous said...

Debbie, thank you for sharing! I too have your blog be my bookends of my day, and if I am home during the day, I also check it...because you all are in my prayers off and on all day! I just can not imagine what you are going through! I am sure the writing in this blog by each of you, is healing to you as you all right, but it is like a 'devotional' every day for me! I am so encouraged by your comments and scriptures...they are touching my soul as I am going through some drama/trauma in my life. I am praising God for computers and blogs!!
Your sister in Christ, Liz

Rebecca said...

Debbie and family, I so wish that there was something I could do to make your anguish disappear, but as a mom I know that's not likely. So, just know that God keeps you all on my heart daily and you are covered in prayer. Father please bless my sister and her family so that they hear every word you speak to their hearts. Don't allow anything to drown out your voice so that they will know for sure that you are there and they can draw strength directly from you. Help them to see as you do and be comforted by knowing that you are way ahead of them and have provided for this time in their lives. Saturate them with you love and healing. Give Jacob the strength he needs for today and prepare him for the next to come. Help him rememeber how to breathe on his own and to quickly learn how to speak in this new fashion. Father, please take him through this withdrawal and provide peace to his body as it gives up the meds. We ask that you keep any infection in check and that the new grafts will take root and grow. We ask it all in Jesus.

Anonymous said...

Stay strong Kirkendalls!!! We are praying for your family everyday. We have seen many miracles over the years. You have our team with you and we never give up! ((((((HUGS)))))).
Tiffany, OT

Noree said...

Dear hearts~
We too follow your blog; sometimes hourly. As a mom, when I read Debbie's words, my heart aches. Yet, I also marvel at her strength. Though it may "look" like the world is going on as usual, know that so MANY are praying for you~reading the blog~asking their own family and friends to pray as well. And pray they do.
Father, keep a tight grip on this amazing family.
We love you Tommy, Debbie, your 3 wonderful boys, sweet Kirky, and our treasured Bob and Laurie. We are (this ever growing community) all here for you, and will continue to be.
Bless, bless, bless,
Noree and family

Anonymous said...

Debbie and family: My family are praying for Jake, you and your family all the time since it happened. Carissa, my three and half years old granddaughter, prayed for Jake before his very first surgery "Oh, God help Jake sleeps well so he can have surgery tomorrow." Joshua, six years old grandson, said "God help doctors and nurses to do a good surgery..." This morning as I was singing the hyme "Still Sweeter Every Day by W. C. Martin & C. Austin Miles" in the worship, your family picture emerged in my mind. I am praying that through this painful journey we all see His glory and able to sing Still Sweeter Every Day.
*My heart is sometimes heavy, but He comes with sweet relief. He folds me to His bosom when I droop with blighting grief. I love the Christ who all my burdens in His body bore. Each day He grows still sweeter than He was the day before. The half can not be fancied this side the golden shore. Oh, there He'll be still sweeter than He ever was before.

love, Becky

Anonymous said...

I read your blog each night before I go to bed and compose wise and inspirational thoughts to say to you First thing in the morning I'm again reading your entries of Robbie's remarkable gift, Tom's and Debbie's honest expressions of anguish and hope, and Jacob's strength.

I wish I could take you back to the path you were on the first part of June instead of the detoured path since the first of July..

all I can really do is to surround you, with my invisible arms, with peace, protection and love...

kay thompson


Joslin3 said...

So good to hear from you too Debbie! With my newest little man, I spend a lot of time in the rocking chair throughout the night and a lot of my praying for Jacob is happening then, while I pray that you're resting. So many people are lifting each of you up.

Laura Hearn Joslin

John Hixson said...

Oh, Debbie, I read the Kirkendall blogs to help me pray specifically for each family member. But the gratitude you expressed towards so many folks here ministered to me! In a troublesome depressive state, I was brought to realize that gratitude for all of God's goodness, which you have even in this "fire", sustains the brokenhearted. "Those who sow (give thanks/praise) in tears shall reap with joyful shouting." (Psalm 126:5) God bless you!
Prayers from Judy Hixson

jcollister said...

I used to live in SC and heard about your son from a friend. I have been reading your blog every day. I cannot tell you how important it is what you are doing. Your honesty in expressing your emotions in working through your faith with 'fear and trembling' is one of the most clear signs of God's hand truly touching and comforting your lives. Yes i here miracles at church of people saved, or a miracle cure and it gets mundane, and i start to question God's existence. But this reminds me that God is truly there. He is omnipotent in every way, and i truly needed to read your testimony. And Jacob's journey. Your family is a modern day electronic chapter of Job, and i hope that you continue this blog well into his recovery. God is making Jacob's life a walking testimony to his power and sovereignty and grace. Anyone who comes in contact with him or ever hear's his story will not be able to doubt a loving God is alive and waiting for them. I love you and am praying for you. Jeremy

Heidi said...

Debbie, Continuing to pray for you, Jacob and your family. May you have the peace of God.
Love, Heidi Mackie :)